Loretta Itamah is the Founder of Legacy Conscious Parenting. She stands at the forefront of revolutionising how families approach child upbringing in today’s complex world. Her pioneering work seamlessly blends emotional intelligence principles with practical parenting strategies, earning her recognition as one of the most influential voices in contemporary parenting education.
Drawing on her extensive expertise in emotional intelligence and behavioural management, Loretta has developed a groundbreaking framework that transforms challenging parenting moments into opportunities for profound family connection. Her innovative methodology has garnered a devoted following through her acclaimed YouTube channel and digital platforms, where she delivers compelling insights that resonate with parents globally.
As a sought-after speaker and educational consultant, Loretta’s enduring impact lies in her ability to not just teach parenting techniques, but to fundamentally reshape how families understand and navigate the responsibility of raising emotionally resilient children thereby creating lasting family legacies. She shares her journey with 120edgenews.com.
By Victoria Onehi
How did Legacy Conscious Parenting begin?
I had always wanted to give my children the life I did not have and this was in terms of affluence and some privileges I could not access, growing up. So threw myself into working really hard to make big on that promise. A couple of years later, I lost my three day old daughter and my world tore into a billion shreds. Hmmmmm. I thought money could give my children the life I did not have but money couldn’t even give my baby girl life. I was shattered, hurt and disappointed. It changed the trajectory of my life. I lost interest in everything. Thankfully. After all the panic and anxiety attacks and everything in between, I moved on with my life but with this question in my heart: what life did I not have as a child and how can I give it to my children?
We were blessed with a lovely angel a few years later but then I got stuck. I still did not know how best to serve my kids or what to give them, that would be monumental. I was listening to Eric Thomas an American motivational speaker and author one day and he said a lot of us were capable of a hundred percent but were living below our potentials. He said to do an inventory of our lives to see where we were falling short and I ran a diagnosis and sincerely told myself that I was on 70 percent in parenting and had to do better.
I went in search for how I could level up and be a better parent and I found out that there were parents who were not just raising children but doing so from a place of knowledge and clarity.
Finally, I found a way to give my children the life I did not have so I threw myself into learning and evolving, becoming a parenting advantage. And with this, I would say, I found my purpose, but I did not know that quite yet.
One day, I went in search of a school for my little girl and the head of school was blown away by the questions I was asking when I was making enquiries(we have a checklist for school search, to pick the right one for our kids). She then said what I was learning was too much for only my kids and family and asked me to come speak at their school event for moms and I did. This is how The Lorie Brand was birthed.
What was your experience teaching at the Mother’s Day Out in the school like?
It was fun, it was exciting. I am actually a trained educationist, so teaching is one of the things I love and enjoy. Though, I prefer it away from the regular classroom. I like to walk people from maybe a point of little knowledge or zero knowledge to the point where you see that look on their faces, showing they understand what I am saying. That Eureka moment! So, it was fascinating for me and amazing. The Head of School told me that one of the parents said, she was weeping because she felt I was speaking to her. For that kind of personal touch, it was humbling and honouring for me.
What do you hope to achieve with Excellent Parent Tribe?
Excellent Parent Tribe (EPT) is the Community part of Legacy Conscious Parenting. When we were growing, we were always told that it takes a village to raise a child. Sadly, we are seeing that is fast eroding. Because most of the time, we are behind our devices. There used to be a time when we would go to the public/community field and play football or play with our friends. That is fast eroding. What you see now is more of people doing things online, the whole entire framework of the digital world. So, the Excellent Parent Tribe is a true tribe that is digital. I’m hoping we can have meetings that we can host physically with parents in those locations being around and available. In this tribe, we are not judgmental; no criticism, no shame. It’s a tribe where parents can come with a lot of authenticity and vulnerability, to just build that support network around parents where they can speak-out, be themselves and get help from others.
How do you hope to help parents build their relationship with children?
One day at a time. Considering my experience with my children, it’s not necessarily about abandoning your life as a parent or leaving everything you are doing. It is about those little moments, that sliding door moment where they say, ‘mummy can I get a hug or a High five?’ Or they hear you say ‘well done; this is beautiful.’ Those are the little moments that actually count. By being present, they know they can get a hug. For busy parents, you can create pockets of time. I have a system where I spend an hour each week with each of my children. We have shared activities we do together because I want to connect with them. If you do not have an hour, you can get 30 minutes. You can even give them 10 minutes. Most of the time, they don’t even need too much from us. Sometimes, they would even ask you, ‘Mummy, can I do my own thing?
But in all, create that time to be present with them, connect with them. Be intentional and deliberate and try to be consistent. Whatever schedule you have for them and with them would go a long way to help them. but be flexible while at it.
I am just wondering, in this busy world of mums and dads, how do we achieve this?
No offense meant at all, I believe we all have time for things we tag as priority. Like I said earlier, it does not need to be an hour, but those little times you have after you have carried out your day job, can you pour it back into spending time with your children? When you are big on time management, you can be big on productivity.Most importantly, you must define your values. What’s important to you? What do you want to be known for? Because I am a Legacy Conscious Parent, I see connection, relationship, excellence as part of my legacy, meaning that I have to make out time, no matter how busy my schedule is. I have to prioritize my life, and again the discipline of minimalism, and the pursuit of essentialism will help out. I say it without apology, you have no business being in up to five societal engagements or five groups in your church when you don’t have time for your children, which is your primary assignment. So, if you can build all these things and be intentional, clearly defining what is important for you.
How do you go about making this a business?
We are trying to commodify it. All along, it’s been me trying to transition from being a stay-at-home mum to someone who owns a business. We have filmed our first course and also launched a family system engineering programme last week. We help people who are looking to re-invent themselves and go on the journey of mastery, that’s a12-week course. For now, we are doing group coaching and keep creating products. We do weekly podcasts that are free. Currently, I am looking at owning a physical space where parents can come in for training even if it is for a three-hour workshop or a weekly session for our coaching programme. This is what we are doing from this month.
How do you get clients?
For the two programmes we have launched, they are basically free to begin with. This is so we get feedback on how to tweak it. We will then integrate their feedback and see how we can make the program a lot easier. And to get clients, it’s basically going to be word of mouth because excellence is our standard. It’s how we live and breathe here. The quality of our sound, videos and pictures are reputational that when you interact with our touch points, you already know that we are serious-minded. It’s going to be a no-brainer getting clients.
Were there certifications you had to get to get to this point?
I am an associate practitioner with institute of Family Engineering and Development (IFED). I did a Family System and Engineering certification with them. I am also a member of the Network of Family Systems Engineering Practitioners. I am currently working on doing a parenting certification with IFED as well. Apart from that I have learnt so much about emotional intelligence and more. It’s been a journey for me; understanding what this means in a structured environment before opening the door to clients was very sacrosanct.
What drives you? What makes you wake up and do this?
My daughters, my father, my husband. My family, really. Because my faith, excellence and family are my biggest values. But then, my children, because this is my legacy. That I am able to raise well adjusted wholesome kids. My children are my legacy, that I will be known to have ended my journey with. Then my father because he has always believed in me. He keeps pushing me and saying you can do it. Then my elder brother too because we grew up together, basically like twins.
For me, a Legacy Conscious Parent, driving Legacy Consciousness, my family is my first why. When I feel fatigued or want to quit, I have their pictures on my vision board. I tell myself the world must be a better place for my children. If I raise them well and they mingle with people who do not have that solid foundation, they can make an impact in such lives. So that’s what pushes me.
How supportive has your spouse been in bringing this vision to light?
He is my biggest supporter, my greatest Cheerleader. I would say I owe most of my success to him. He saw in me this greatness before I knew it myself. He thought me about self-confidence, help me build my self-esteem and self perception. Every time I tell myself, I am not doing this today. He tells me, Where? How? You better get up. And there was a day I had a challenge and I was scared and afraid. He said something to me that I carry with grace and audacity. He said, “it’s you ….when have you not turned water into wine.” That statement spurs me on!
How are Nigerians buying into this vision?
Being visionary means you are thinking in the future where the world has not caught up to yet. You are trying to show it to them, because some people learn by seeing and not hearing. Most times, we have a fixed mindset as against the growth mindset. We are hostile to change. But we are at Legacy Conscious Parenting, are patient, reminding them and showing up often to tell them about being Legacy Conscious Parens. Most of the people I work with have been with me for a while and I have stayed with the identity and reputation I have built.They try what we teach and it works for them. I ask them how did that make you feel? And I ask them, now that you have tried this, what if we add this one? We teach them to continue to show grace and not be judgemental because change is painful and makes you uncomfortable.
Do you see yourself building a school out of this in the future?
I will consider that. Thank you for believing in what we do and sharing that thought.
Where do you see the Legacy Conscious Parenting brand in the next five years?
We are already living in the five years in our dreams, we cannot wait for time to catch on. In the next five years, I see an army growing out of Excellent Parent Tribe. I see parents coming together as we used to in the past, standing in the gap for each other. I see no reason why as a mother, I cannot correct your child for doing the wrong thing. I don’t know how we were sold that falsehood. I see that changing as we stand by what we preach. The mantra we live by in the community is “how can I help”?
Instead of judging or castigating. For Legacy Conscious Parenting, in the next five years, we hope to have a wonderful training centre. Our conferences will be full blown annual programmes and events that parents can come to, because the world will be catching up with the vision too. Every parent who has passed through our system will be an ambassador of the programme, ideologies, vision and frameworks. They will be transplanting the change to their families and together we will raise a generation of whole, healed, wholesome parents who will in turn raise the generation of children that are healed and wholesome too.
How many parents do you have in this tribe presently?
We launched about three weeks ago. At the Community level, we are close to a hundred. For now, it is virtual; although many members have been pushing for physical meetings. We have a WhatsApp community and we have our family meetings every Saturday night. It’s usually so much fun.
Who can join?
Everybody is welcome to join, dads and mum alike. A lot of fathers think parenting is the mum’s job; that can be very frustrating and challenging. What this does is that, you see someone trying to drive growth and change and the other person is stuck in the past. They say it is women that raise children. For instance, I am saying let’s reduce screen time for children, but because the other parent does not understand, he says the children can have screen time all day. This slows down the wheel of learning. One of the duties that we have is to carry the dads along, however difficult and challenging that’s going to be.
Do you see parents dropping questions about challenges they are facing with their children?
For now, we are trying to build a rapport. What we are doing with our weekly meeting is to bring controversial or common challenges that parents face raising their children. Parents open up and share personal experiences and more. So we build trust. Over time the new members will see that as a culture and continue.
Is there any criteria before one can join?
Anybody is welcome to join provided you have a growth mindset and you are ready to be a part of a community where change, healing, and love leads. We have some community managers already. Anybody who wants to join can drop a number with my COO(theloriebrand@gmail.com) and we will take it up from there. We are 100 persons across the world. Canada, United Kingdom, and other part of the world. One person tells the other and so the community keeps growing. Excellent Parent Tribe means you are knowledgeable and sound. Members of the community are called Beacons, which means “guiding light”. To remind us that as parents, we are called to be guiding lights
How are you mentoring people to drive this with you?
I pray very fervently for people I work with. I went into this because, like Moses, I said I cannot speak, I stutter. I told God, I will go into this, if you give me the right people to work with me. In order not to burn out, the company has about four members of staff and five community managers. By just living by the values we define, it helps us to be motivated. Living it, showing and not telling, gets people to align, and they want to continue in that light too.
What are your final words?
My final words will be for us not seeing parenting as a job we need to do haphazardly because God said to whatever you do, like you are doing it for Him. Raise your children like you are raising them for God. You can do a life audit. In your personal life, your parenting journey, are you giving it a hundred percent? Do you need to do it better? Do you need help? When you have children coming from wholesome homes and the ones which are not, the difference is clear. The ones from wholesome homes are able to face challenges. They are more resilient, more emotionally balanced and have grit and determination. So, you are not helping your family by staying small. Change, and by all means, keep being excellent. Keep parenting today with the future in mind.
